The New Year

Did you ever stop to think that it's really all about the little things. I mean the big things in life are nice but it's the little things that make life. It's often the little things we take for granted too. Like finding our keys right where we left them (they aren't always there, you know) or waking up to your alarm ('cause it sucks when you wake up half an hour before it goes off) or having a good hair day or having enough milk left in the container for the bowl of cereal you decided to have. It's these little things that can really determine what kind of day we could have. And when you have a day where all the little things go wrong...you've had a bad day!!

And what about things like getting a phone call or email from a friend just saying hi, or someone says or does something nice for you just cause, or you notice some beautiful flowers, or when you try and assemble something and it only takes you one try.

The list could go on and on...you hear your favorite song, someone lets you go ahead of them in the grocery line when they see you only have 2 things and they have a gazillion. Yep, it's all about the little things in life.

So, for all of you I am wishing you the little things this new year. May your days be filled with the little things and may you not take them for granted. May you appreciate all those little things. May God bless you richly through all those little things!!

Tears and Rain

Ever feel like crying for no real apparent reason? That's how I'm feeling right now. I'm not totally sure why but I think I know, but not really. I came to a realization this week, maybe that's why. I've yet to really accept this realization but just because I'm not accepting of it doesn't mean it's not true. But maybe it's a combination of things...frustrations, annoyances, feelings, emotions, hormones. Yep, those darn hormones, they can make life pretty interesting.

Ever feel happy for no apparent reason? I'm not feeling like that right now (as previously mentioned) but I do have moments like that too. I like those moments. Moments where "nothing" makes you smile. You're just happy in your nothingness. Peaceful, content...

It rained tonight. November second and it rained. It smelled so fresh. I loved it.

Anyway, that's it for now.

FLOWERS

I decided I needed a new look to my blog. I think I like it but haven't really decided. I also need a new picture but since my computer crashed I haven't been able to access all my pictures in picassa from the blog site. I guess that will be for another day. Anyway...

My spring/summer has been busy with many trips home, weddings, spending time with friends and, of course, work. I feel like it has flown by and am not looking forward to the cold that is coming. I am enjoying the weather we re having now, though, along with all the gorgeous colours of fall.

I decided I would post some pictures of flowers. I like flowers. They make me happy. This is just kinda a test to see if I like my blog. I will try to blog more often but I'm not making any promises...

Mother's Day!!

Happy Mother's Day to my wonderful mom!!

I made a quick trip home Monday morning to spend some time with my mom for Mother's Day. I was there less than 24 hours but we had a wonderful time.




Brian and I took mom and dad out to Tobin Lake for supper. It was beautiful out there. The sunset was amazing as it reflected on the water.





The sad thing is that there is still ice on the lake. It was still pretty, just not a usual sight for this time of year. Hopefully it will soon be gone!!

Happy Birthday

So people have been getting after me to blog about Guatemala so I guess it is time to get on it now that life has slowed down a bit. Part of the problem is that there is so much to tell I don't even know where to start so I think what I am going to do is just go through my pictures and tell stories accordingly.But, Guatemala stories won't start until my next blog.This one is all about me...and my 30th birthday!!

I returned home from Guatemala to find my room filled with 750 balloons. That's a whole lot of balloons. My friends informed me it took them 2 hours to to stuff my room. I informed them that it took me half an hour to pop them and another half an hour to clean up the latex massacre. As you can see from the pictures I am in about 5 feet of balloons...just my head sticking out!! I could hardly open the door and when I did they came pouring out into the hall. I don't know how they got them all in there. Needless to say, I didn't get to sleep in my bed that night. LOL. I will also warn you that I look terrible in the pics because I had been up since 3 am and it was now after midnight...a long day of traveling. I was exhausted. Thank You everyone who helped with this surprise. It is a great 30th birthday memory!! (See facebook for more pics).


Another great birthday memory was going to The Phantom of the Opera with Allison. I have never been to anything like this before and it was amazing!! Loved it. I think I'm hooked!! We went to the matinee on Saturday then met some other friends for supper. We were kind of getting a little loud and when the manager came over to our table we thought she was going to ask us to leave. We were wrong, thank goodness, but funny none the less. After eating entirely too much, being embarrassed by a loud rendition of happy birthday 2 times (once by the staff and once by a solo performance brought specially to me by Shawna) we left before we did actually get asked to leave.



That led to the next part of the evening...which was playing the game of life. Now, this kinda sounds like it wouldn't be that exciting but when you change the rules and add some of your own...Life becomes a lot more fun...and funnier!! Alison had many tickets for reckless driving, and had many car accidents that involved her kidnapped children...cause she couldn't have her own. I blame the Bahama Mamas (aka Maui Waui's). Joleen, on the other hand, was a baby making machine. Shawna was into farming...many things, and Sheila was just a little slow in life!!

Anyway, some good memories, some good times. Thanks everyone!!

THANKFUL

I just want to say how thankful I am for family and friends. Your support has been overwhelming once again. I can not begin to explain what that means to me. A friend told me tonight that she thought I wasn't telling many people about this trip. I guess I wasn't sure of how people would take to it all with everything else that is going on. I was very wrong!! I have been humbled and overwhelmed with the support.

I sometimes feel that my health is the thorn in my side. It is one of the things in my life that humbles me (ask me and I can tell you many humbling stories!!) and that keeps me crying out continually to the one who has fashioned me this way. At a young age I decided that my health was not going to stop me from doing the things in life that I wanted to do, things that I was passionate about. (Fear or good judgment might but not my health!!) I know and feel that God is once again using my situation for HIS purpose.

I know some are hesitant of me going back to Guatemala and I understand their hesitancy. I know I don't have to explain myself but feel that it fits well with Bob's lesson on commitment and vows from Nehemiah today. When I decided to go to Guatemala for the third time it was only after much prayer and consideration. I know that it is a passion for me but I also want to do God's will for my life. When I felt like God was giving me the okay to go then I made my commitment to Him and to the team. Commitment of time (I take holiday time from work), commitment of money and commitment of self...physically, mentally and spiritually , (am I willing to be challenged...cause there is SOO much personal growth and learning in these experiences, I'm never ready for it but am I willing?) I know I have health problems but my health problems will exist no matter if I am here or in Guatemala. I made that commitment when I was feeling well. God knew what was yet to come my way before I left. He gave me peace about that decision. I'm trusting that my God will take care of me, that His name will be honoured and that no matter what happens, it is for the betterment of His kingdom. I know He is with me no matter where I am in this world.

I am not on the plane until bright and early Friday morning (Okay, it'll be early but not so bright yet.) I am willing to stay if that is what I feel He is telling me. Please continue to pray!!

LIFE

Life is what happens when you're busy making plans.

Yep, that kind of describes how things are going for me right now.

There have been so many unexpected things come up in my life lately that I don't even know where to start. I can't even say that they're good things either. That would be way easier to handle. And some of the things I have tried to plan...well they just haven't been going as planned.

Anyways...

I am asking for your prayers. They are greatly needed at this time.

I leave for Guatemala on the 11th of April. I am going for 12 days this time around. I am very excited but scared at the same time as my health has been very uncooperative for the past bit. Please pray for my health and safety of travel and that God will make it clear to me if it would be unwise to travel at this time. Right now I feel that I am to go ahead as planned but...things don't always go as we plan May I have an open heart to what He wants me to do.

Also pray for the work we will be doing there...that people will see Christ in us and through us...that doors will be opened for opportunity to share, not just about the physical healing that Christ can bring, but also of the spiritual healing He can bring to those who believe, because of what He did for us on the cross.

Thank You in advance for your prayers, they are much needed and appreciated.

A Celebration!!

I wanted to do a blog about Easter but I had a really hard time putting all my thoughts together. I mean how do you really put in to words what Christ did for each and every one of us? Can our human minds really even comprehend it all? I don't think we can.

This is what I do know. Christ died for me and my sins. He took on MY sins. And not just my sins, but the sins of the WHOLE world. Can you imagine carrying the sins of the whole world? But it didn't stop there. Not only did He die for me...he defeated death and was resurrected. Now that is the celebration!! He rose again!! The cross and the tomb are empty!! Through that resurrection He brought life to EVERYONE who believes. And not just life, but ETERNAL life. Those of us who believe are going to live FOREVER with God. How can we not celebrate that?

What a gift. Can you imagine the day?!

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. In his great mercy he has given us a new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade - kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God's power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you greatly rejoice." 1 Peter 1:3-6a

La Tortuga De Mar (The Turtle)

About 2 years ago I developed a great love of the turtle. I am not 100% sure as to why or where this love came from. Perhaps because they are not at the top too many peoples list of favorite animals. They're the underdog. They're not terribly cuddly, kinda ugly looking and you can't really interact with them much. Although they are kinda ugly, I find them very beautiful creatures, as most of God's creation is. (I say most because there are some creatures that I just can not find beauty in...ie. bats, snakes, some spiders. I know some may beg to differ but I will disagree). Maybe it is for these reasons I love the turtle so.

Some look at the turtle and see the shell as symbolizing heaven and the square underside symbolizing the earth. The turtle represents how we as humans need to unite heaven and earth in our own lives.The turtle withdraws and goes within when it is in turmoil. It naturally knows to do this.The turtle's life is one of steadfastness in effort and patience, slow and steady. A life of "non doing". The turtle is also always at home within itself.

I think we have a lot to learn from the turtle. How often do we as humans try and solve our problems on our own. It seems that only after our efforts fail do we look to God (who is in us) for help. We rarely do this naturally. And what about patience? How patient are we with God's plan for our lives? We want to know the answer now and most of us are not satisfied when He answers our prayers with a wait. We would even sometimes rather have an answer we don't want than to have to wait. And that life of "non doing"? Haha. we are such a society of do do do and go go go. We have little time to sit and do nothing and just listen to what God has to say to us, to bring our desires to God or to just praise Him. And how many of us are at home with ourselves? We are always striving to have what others have, to meet societies demands, to be people we are not or people that God did not intend us to be. I mean it is good to strive to be the person God wants us to be but we often tend to strive to be other things as well. We are not happy with who God wants us to be...we want to be what society thinks we should be. The two are often not congruent.

Yes, we have a lot to learn.

So, the next time you see a turtle, be it living or otherwise, think about what it represents. Could you take some lessons from this creature? I know I could!!

More Ramblings

So, I figured I should blog again. Life has been busy but I can't really tell you what I have been doing. March is going to be even busier and then April is here...when I return to Guatemala (if all goes as planned). I guess it is a good way to say good bye to my 20's and hello to the big three-o!! Yep, thirty. I'm quite alright with it. I've had a whole year to get use to the idea that I will be thirty and not fit into society's mold of what that means. Not that that means much...I have never fit into the mold society puts on people so why should this be any different. I decided that this year was going to be a year filled with a lot of fun and adventure. I got an early start on that...a prequel to my thirtieth year, I guess.


Life is as you make it. I never thought myself much of an optimist but I guess I am (as has been pointed out to me by a friend). How you view life affects how you deal with things. I think you need to take what you've been given and make the most of it. Not to say that there won't be bumps in the road, that you won't go through grieving times, times where you'd rather just give up than go on. You take that much needed time then do what you got to do to use that as opportunity. Not that you necessarily need to move on, you just make the most of it. But I guess your experiences also shape how you view life. I try to be understanding of that but I know I could be more so. I often wonder if I could be around someone with a pessimistic view of life with out it getting to me?...Hmm...



Life is also what happens when we are busy making plans...and that can be good, bad or indifferent. We never know where life is going to take us. Sometimes things just come out of no where and cause us to reevaluate things in our lives, which is never a bad thing. But sometimes we are challenged in areas where we thought we knew exactly what we thought. And that is sometimes what causes the most problems. Anyway...Allison tells me I talk in riddles. Perhaps I do when I don't know how to say what I want. I was never good with words... expressing how I feel or what is on my mind. O well.

Public Confession

I didn't really know what to title this entry but thought that the title would at least get people's attention. I guess I could of called it "New Years Resolution " but I don't make new years resolutions... for 2 reasons...I can make changes at any time in my life, why wait for a new year, and...I have yet to meet anyone who has actually succeeded at keeping a resolution made at the new year. Maybe I'm just scared of failure.. who knows.

Anyway...

My confession is this...Over the years I have written many notes, cards, letters and words of encouragement to many people in my life...people I have known very well and are great friends as well as people that I have crossed paths with briefly in my life. Right now you're thinking "and the problem is??" Well the problem is... that they hardly ever get sent. They sit on my desk or cupboard or in a drawer or are carried around in a bag or purse until i finally resort to throwing them out. My garbage has seen many cards and notes come its way. I'm not 100 percent sure as to why I don't end up giving them to the people they are intended for. I have a few thoughts behind it all but i will not bore with the details. So, my resolution is that I will work on actually sending people these cards, notes and words of encouragement. Writing them is not the problem...it is the sending, as you can see.

I don't really know why I have decided that this is important. I guess it is because I know that when I hear kind words, when I get a note of encouragement, even a card just saying hi it, at the least, makes me smile. I figure if I can make someone smile, even briefly, about a situation, in the midst of chaos, or whatever, then why not!!

I received something from someone the other day. It made me smile. It reminded me of the many promises and blessings of God. She didn't write anything herself but she thought I would like it. Sometimes that is all it takes.

It all seems so simple...

So, I have already sent one. It only sat on my cupboard one day and then I took it to work and put in the mailbox of the person it was intended for. I did have a whole conversation with my self about it all (see previous blog entry about conversing with self).but decided that this is what I decided I needed to work on over the next year and that I was going to improve in this area and I was NOT going to FAIL.

(I know, I Know, it really does sound like a new years resolution, but it isn't!!)

Anyway, I may continue to have a very happy and encouraged garbage...but hopefully not. Hopefully I will be able to encourage the many people in this blessed life of mine.

Random Thoughts

Well, I thought I should blog but I don't really know what to blog about. I think that is part of my problem with blogging...I always have so much going on in this mind of mine that I find it hard to focus it down to just one thing so I decided I would just blog about some of the random thinking...

Why are nurses responsible for everything that goes on in the hospital. I had been at work for an hour yesterday and THREE parents/caregivers came out and made it very clear about things that they were not happy about. I'm sorry that those things happened but they were totally out of our control. By the end of my shift I decided that some times you're the pigeon and some times you're the statue and yesterday we were definitely the statue (we were crapped on a lot!!)

I am thankful for good friends. I spent the day with a good friend today then came home and talked on the phone with another for over 2 hours!! These friends are both friends that I can do and/or say anything with. I can not care, I can vent, I can laugh or cry, I can be me. They understand me and know where I am coming from. They listen. They think I'm weird but they like me for it (i think, lol). They are wonderful friends and I think I'll keep them around.

I really had a good time at home this Christmas. I had enough time off to go home for a few more days. This meant we could have some down time and just hang out and visit with family and friends. There was time to do about half the things (maybe) we wanted to do. We ate too much, played games and just had a really good time.

I wonder if other people have total one sided conversations with themselves...or is it just me. I think it comes from living on my own. It all just carries on nicely in my head. I don't necessarily answer myself but it's more just like one big run-on thought. Is this bad? Maybe this is why I don't have many friends...I don't need them...I just converse with myself...much easier this way...just kidding I do have friends (I think).

I hate fat days. I really do. And the worst thing about it is I can't even talk about it. As soon as i mention it people bite my head off. I didn't say I was fat or that I even thought I was fat. I said I am having a fat day...meaning I am feeling larger than previous days... usually meaning the shirt i want to wear isn't quite fitting how it should or how it usually does. I do have fat days okay!!

I wonder what this year is going to bring for me. Will I be brave enough to do the things I want to? Will I make new friends, try new things, see new places? Will it be a year of new beginnings? (It's the year of the rat, you know, which signifies hard work and new beginnings, so I've been told.) Will this be a good year full of good times and good memories or a year filled with hardship and challenges? I am really hoping for the good year but we don't always get what we want do we?!!

Well, that's about it for now. And just in case anyone is wondering I am planning to go to Guatemala in April!! I missed my opportunity to go in February but I trust that God knows what He is doing when He closed that door. Please pray for me...heaven knows I need it!!

At home this Christmas it was like a winter wonderland. Very beautiful!!

<-Playing games at Christmas time